A Style Post?

Style

“Style” is like an untouched room waiting to be filled on my platform. The doors of this page have been shut for much too long purely because fashion has been the last thing on my mind alongside many others due to life getting in the way. Nonetheless, I want to challenge myself, to reopen places I once found comfort in. I’m going to kick things off with this post.

Tanny SV 06Tanny SV 13Tanny SV 05

I’m wearing this lovely blouse from Zara, paired with palazzo trousers I bought from H&M. I love Palazzo trousers; with barely any hips and pretty much a flat behind I find that the trousers will hug you from the waist down in all the right places, leaving a neat finish. The blouse is simple, but prominent in its design therefore being the staple piece of my outfit. I didn’t want either ends of my outfit to be loud so piecing the blouse with simple white trousers gave me this balance. For more on balance, head on over to my previous post which isn’t quite about fashion but more about friendships.

On our way back through the country park the sun came out just before it would leave for the day and @lesstakesphotos and I ran for it. We managed to catch these lovely portrait shots. Thank you, for always having time for my ideas and allowing me to bring them to life.

See you soon with another “Style” Post

Love always

Her Last Petal xTanny SV 09

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Finding a Balance in Your Relationships

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We live life subconsciously expecting to receive something back whenever we give. When life has its pauses, I’m often triggered to reflect and hopefully learn something. I’ll share with you what I have learnt about myself regarding expectations from loved ones.

In life, we will meet and connect with a handful of people who hold some sort of significance in our lives. You will offer someone an escape route, a place where they can offload, and they will have someone to offer that same space for. Relationships should always find a balance, but a balance doesn’t always have to be in between two exact measurements. Balance can even be found where one weight is heavier than another. What is important is that both objects (in our case people) are in a place they should be. Imagine a seesaw; a child is more likely going to be dragged down by your weight and you will find that they are looking up to you, learning from all of the experiences you are carrying. What you teach them, alongside the experiences they will personally learn whilst they grow will one day add to their weight, and they will catch up. The balance is always in the right place.

You will find yourself in relationships where the other party often discusses their personal lives to you, offering you little to no chances of ever talking about your own journey. This might cause discomfort in the relationship, but understand that the person seeking you needs you. There is a light you’re offering to them which allows them to channel through life with a clearer lens. You will often find that the little chances you get to talk about yourself, you have no appetite to do so because perhaps they may not offer the same comfort you offer to them. This is because they offer you a different sort of comfort that comes in the form of something else; it fills you. It may also be the case that that same comfort you’re looking for is in someone else. The only thing I can say about a toxic relationship is that you know one when you are in one. Just walk away. I also want to emphasise that there is nothing wrong with a balance that occurs where both people are holding the same weight. This in its own right is what is needed for the postulate of that relationship. Where a rhythm between the two will be one and the pauses will fall into place at the right time.

Understand that there are several types of relationships, not all are made to be the same where you are given exactly what you give in. The blessings from that friend come in a different way, and learn to value and appreciate that.

I’ll leave you with some words I wrote some time this year which I feel are fitting for this post.

Imagine you’re on a journey and you meet someone along the way. Remind yourself of the point at which you have met them, and what premise they have upon your life. This will allow you to rationalise the elements of you they should know. You may be walking side by side, but they will still need to catch up to where you are on your journey. Do not expect for them to understand you in the same way someone else understands you because they entered your journey at a different point in time. There is a lot they have to catch up with. Give them bite sizes. Give them breaks. Water. Make sure there is a bench along the way. Do not overpower them because you assume they will comprehend you. Take it easy on them.

Love always.

HLP x

Growth

WORDS FROM A PETAL

On the 11th of June 2016 I told my love he’d be shaving my hair. He managed to do an alright job but left me with a silly high-top that was intended to be a fade. I enjoyed every moment of it, allowing myself to witness transformation next to a loved one who could sense the impact of just how it felt to let go of hair. Shaving off your hair is not a casual procedure, there’s definitely more to it. As short as the process is; one can argue that it is a journey. Every snip is a wave goodbye to burdens hanging on your shoulders, the moments you shared with your strands erode, and by the time you reach the scalp, you’re prepared for this new chapter. Your scalp is a symbol of an empty room you’ve just moved into waiting to be furnished with new experiences. It is not the first time I’ve chopped my hair off but based on the woman I was becoming at the time; there was a lot I needed to let go off in order to continue growing so not only was it a “big chop”, it was a spiritual chop.

Amongst many of my resemblances, my hair is one of the closest and this is why it means so much to me. Today I am 23. My Hair is exactly a year old too. The pace of our growth has been slow; but we have grown together; and that to me matters more than the length. The strength, health, style of your hair resembles you in the same way your style in clothing does. So whilst the amazing India Arie sings “I am not my hair” (rightfully so, within context), I really am my hair. This is why hair is important to both women and men. Men look forward to visiting the barbers because of the transformation. A fresh trim will make them feel brand new, because subconsciously they can have a fresh start; this is the same for women.

Before the YouTube hair gurus had begun to educate us black women on our hair (which was one of the greatest ideas to ever blossom), I had natural hair; experiencing no issues with my hair. My hair was actually fine and was taken care of rather well. But there were several psychological issues faced because of these videos as they increased. When more awareness is raised on any particular subject matter we become overly conscious of it and begin to do many things and one of them is to compare. Prior to these videos I didn’t find myself making comparisons on hair textures, growth, or the “right” hair products. My hair was simply mine and perfect for me. The comparison came when there was a huge awareness on “how black hair should be”. There was/is nothing wrong with these videos; whether comparison is human nature or a social construct, it still takes place, and I became too aware of the normal things hair would face and stigmatised them as serious issues (purely down to my overthinking self). An explicit example is that if I lost a few hair strands, I would sink into a deep hole thinking my hair was terrible and I needed to change my hair routine. I would dip strands of my hair into water to find out the porosity level of my hair in order to know how to treat it; however this process was not useful for me and I didn’t understand this at the time. I tried many routines, neglecting the one I argue now to be the most important one. The important one being: to first reflect on yourself, your character, your current situation in life and how this is affecting your health, your level of confidence, how you generally feel about your hair and so many other important variables. I began to notice that I was always stressed; due to assignments and other issues life would throw at me. My diet wasn’t great. I didn’t drink enough water. I wasn’t taking care of myself physically and spiritually and this was reflected through the result of my hair. I would receive lovely compliments from loved ones, but I wasn’t happy and I knew something needed to be done.

I decided I needed to chop it all off. To let go of the old me; and to introduce the new me. I had changed. I will continue to change. I want my petals to grow with me, and this is why the layout of my platform has changed, because I too have changed. I want to give you more of who I am and so each time I experience a huge change, I want you to experience it too.

Chopping off my hair paved a way for a new me to unfold, there was so much I began to explore because I had the time and space (in my mind) to do so. I was just approaching the finishing line to studying which also complimented the timing. I have explored sensuality, personal intimacy, the importance of my relationship with God and spirituality, Feminism, the importance of living in the moment, books on personal development, fiction, more Theory, who I am around my friends and family, my style of writing has altered slightly and so much of me has changed. Whilst taking time to prioritise my health, I was diagnosed with a condition that would consequently affect my hair journey; and the texture/volume of my hair made sense to me; which meant my questions had been answered. I really absorbed the idea that your hair can never be the same as another individual’s hair because not only do you live different lives; you’re two complete different beings.

I could be here for a long time telling you the benefits of cutting my hair, but with the increasing trend of black women appreciating their natural hair; I am sure you can have an intimate conversation with one at arm’s length who can express to you their own personal journey. This post is to let you know that I have grown. I plan to express this growth through creative avenues and look forward to doing so. But for now, happy birthday to me, and here’s to more growth. My hair has really been a metaphor to express the importance of what you need to do, to allow growth to happen, and I plan to do so this coming year also.

I LOVE YOU ALL,

HERLASTPETAL.

Loving Wholeheartedly

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 I’ve missed you. My senses are piqued because I can word the conversations I have with myself on this platform. I want to say so much, but I do not know where to start. There are posts I have planned to write for this platform, I want to write them for you, and I will, but I want to also write as effectively as I can and this can only happen when the message reaches the tip of my tongue and can eventually be expressed. When I become so passionate about expressing a particular topic, I then can do it wholeheartedly. Loving, acting, and feeling wholeheartedly is important. Which brings me to the premise of this topic.

Clent Hills ft. TT pt.15

Love wholeheartedly.

Revelations, and reminders of what you already know are fruitful. A caprice was triggered by a revelation I experienced whilst thinking about being happy for people, genuinely happy for people. Alongside this, my realisation was that I want to be living and breathing the words that are falling from my lips. For these words to be soaked in truth as they come out of me.  This became my desire; to honestly mean my words of encouragement, to honestly be happy for people. At that moment, it meant so much for me to dive into that way of being because I sensed a direct relationship with my struggles, downfalls and insecurities. Offering encouragement that I meant with only half of my heart suffocated me, I couldn’t breathe and I wanted to free myself from such a drawback.

Disclaimer: I want to be as transparent as I can to you, it will allow me to serve the purpose of this platform as well as this post. Transparency allows for people to have a clearer view of who you are, so that when I give my two pence it is not a mere mirage.

When I look at my life, I am not where I want to be. There are moments where I am grateful for how far I have come, and there are times where I am clouded by insecurities. Everyone has insecurities which are birthed by a number of agents. For the sake of this post and the aim of my message, I will focus on security/insecurity with regards to societal expectations and the impact this has on our personal relationships (and societal validation). This really needs an essay, nonetheless I will express which ideologies gravitate towards my being. My belief is that insecurity influences people and their relations in society. But how? And what have I decided to do about my own?

Berki (1986) presented the argument that personal security is closely connected to society, as well as personal, reciprocal relationships. The social paradox of security means that we are vulnerable in our relationships, as well as with strangers, but in its extreme form, we may also see each other as threats and enemies. He went on to highlight that issues of security also present moral questions on society’s organisation and how law and rules govern securities. I never fail and will continue to not do so in voicing the pressures against us when it comes to societal expectations which are clearly detrimental to our security. On top of this layer, we are expected to achieve a handful of accomplishments which are presented to us on a timeline that is not empathetic to the uniqueness of our individual paths. These accomplishments rule out the validation of other accomplishments which applies more pressure to channel our energy into a direction we quite frankly do not want to go in. Many of us know… it’s a lot to take in.

When it then boils down to those who are surrounding us, we are faced with so much pressure and thought processes that highlight our insecurities. When we are not secure in an “accomplishment” that is expected at a particular age, and converse with others who have achieved; perhaps we find it difficult to be happy for them wholeheartedly, because we are reminded of an accomplishment we have not yet achieved. I would be naive to think this comes from a negative place, because there are many explanations which could be presented that highlight why these thought processes occur and where they come from. We must find ways to avoid this way of being; its part of the process of unlearning the social constructions presented over time. Most of the time I am happy for the accomplishments that my loved ones achieve. It leaves me whole.  Sometimes, I lose sight of my security, which troubles my existential drive. When I had the revelation that I wanted to love and speak with purity and mean what I say to people, a burden was lifted from my shoulders and I felt a sense of freedom, and contentment. I felt as though I was no longer blocking the accomplishments waiting for me, and that those who seeked my advice about their lack of accomplishment  were lifted from this burden too. It was spiritual to me. One must not offer words of encouragement whilst prioritising their accomplishment/or lack of. Put simply, you cannot think “as long as I get there first” whilst saying “you can do this come on!” because you have prioritised your competitive nature, mixed with the weight of pressure as more important than the struggle being encountered by the individual seeking your words of encouragement. Make sure your words are genuine. Life will become easier for you. You will channel the rest of the energy in a place where it is needed, and X will feel the depth of your passion more. This is what I mean by loving wholeheartedly, and meaning what you say. Your words become thick, and very rich in their taste. Do not dilute your words with a hint of bitterness because you will be presented with a burden. Try to not compare yourself because your path is different, this way you will avoid numerous un-needed existential and identity crises.

Clent Hills ft. TT pt.8

Right now, I feel like I can be attentive to one’s feelings without prioritising my own. This process of selflessness has developed me to become a better version of myself. I am unlearning, stripping myself of garments forced onto me that did not fit. I will see you soon.

Love always,

Her Last Petal.

 

Reference: Berki, R. N. (1986). Security and society: Reflections on law, order and politics. London, Dent.

 

Trips Down Memory Lane

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It is a wintry evening tonight. Here, my memories feel so close that I do touch them. They are people. They are buildings. They are the roads, buses and parks. In this moment I learn to cling tightly to my caprice, a sudden yet comforting one. The cold slaps me into a new direction and I am able to view newer perspectives. The epitome of life. I am reminded that the battles I have encountered were fruitful ones. Where fingers gripped your neck and drowned your head into thick soil, leaving a bitter taste in your mouth. I am learning that the very same bitter taste is what makes it easier for me to stand firm in moments my senses feel helpless, because the ending is always a sweet victory.

I always tell myself that when you grow the guts to speak of a past memory which brought such agony and pain, you’re over it. You can face the same fears knowing you have overcome them. I went to take some photos in my old area with @pics.mnelta and shared intimate memories with myself whilst he worked his magic. Your surroundings do really contribute to your identity and I hold so much value in this particular area.

 

 

 

 

Are You Disrespecting Christians for Calling Yourself One and Not Living According to their Morals?

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This query stems from a deep place in my heart; it is one that knows no answer or solution thus, this will be like a transcript of my mind. So bear with me here, we may go into different directions (as the mind does), but I will try. I will begin with explaining in the most efficient way my spiritual walk so you can get to know a bit about me. At 17 I decided to dedicate my life to Christ and so my mind, body, soul, and spirit rested on the belief that I was Christian. Five years later the same standpoint still exists. Like any other individual who fully indulges in questioning their existence and life in general, you change with every discovery so my soul has given birth to new ideas and standpoints, and simultaneously I have waved goodbye to a few. This process of learning and unlearning continues. For most of my life, it has been about what feels right, rather than what is perceived to be right, which has often gotten me into quite some trouble with people (Christian or not). To exemplify, in the event of a Christian telling me to wear a long skirt instead of a slightly shorter one when I attend church, I might argue that the way I dress shouldn’t/cannot define my entity as a Christian, taking the discussion to another level.  The essence of my being finds comfort in feeling; if it feels right then it is what it is for that moment. If I feel Gods palpable soul, in that moment, speaking to me, I listen. It is this reason why you may find me disagreeing with a Christian but standing in church bathing in the Holy Spirit because it feels right.

Isn’t there something wrong with this? As a Christian is this not a total contradiction?

My way of life may be ostensible and I wouldn’t be surprised if others felt this way. My issue is not that too few people follow my way of being, rather that I’m being discourteous towards Christians who are dedicated to the morals of the Religion. My point is that if you identify yourself as a Christian but choose to not adhere to the morals mirroring the Religion, are you not creating a bad name for those dedicated to the whole spiritual doctrine? I believe it is a very different case if you are Christian, and make mistakes unwillingly or continue to make attempts to better your Christian walk because your ethos of life still attempts to live accordingly to your spiritual identity. Albeit, if you are a Christian who actually disagrees to some of the biblical teachings and morals, yet still bases their identity on the Religion, are you not making your life more difficult? How will you come across to your peers if you state your Religion and only intentionally partake in the ways of being Christian when you decide it is right? What standard are you setting as a Christian? But more importantly how egocentric is that? These are unanswered questions I may/may not find an answer to.

At this moment in time, the God residing in the home of Christianity is where I find absolute peace and it is who I turn to in my time of need. Social Identity and Self Identity is very important, and identifying yourself with particular discourses can really impact on your physical and emotional well-being. I understand that if I place myself inside the home of a Religion: that is exactly how people will identify me. If however my decisions are driven by listening to my soul, and my identity contradicts the very same home I have consciously decided to enter, how detrimental is that to myself, those loyal to that identity, and my close family and friends?

I don’t know whether I can still identify myself as Christian, and I probably won’t be making a decision any time soon. Even if I were to let go of the title I would still hold the very same values, morals and pray to the same God because my decisions to let go would be solely based on the fact that I wouldn’t want to be misrepresenting a body of people living a life that is purely about Christianity.

Tell me your thoughts

Happy New Year, love always

HLP x

Finding Inspiration in those Closest to Home

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For some reason, no one has ever really asked me who I look up to the most, or who I find inspiration from. Whilst many can name the men and women who have influenced the masses because of their noble work, I struggle to find one that I can look up to purely because I only know what the person has done, and yes that is inspiring but I want to see the hard work it took to get to where he/she needed to get to. It’s because my faith comes to life more when I can physically touch or see the work put in.

 I always believe in an individual’s passion, but it means more to me when I am moved to a different dimension, a newer level of existence and understanding. I experienced something extraordinary recently, which left me gasping for words I couldn’t find because the moment was that sensational. MOAK a spoken word poet, recently wrote a poem entitled UNHEARD encapsulating personal frustrations (which many can relate to), in relation to parental expectations of (predominately) African Caribbean young adults. Our parents want the best for us undoubtedly, and when much emphasis is put onto this, those who are deeply talented in the arts may struggle to express their true love to their parents. It becomes more difficult to bring to life your calling. I admire those who have clearly expressed themselves and will always have faith that one day your parent(s) will truly believe in your craft if they haven’t already done so. I’m inspired by your passion and your drive to be the best version of yourself. I’ve seen MOAK perform on numerous occasions but I was moved by this particular performance so much that my feelings had to find refuge on this blog of mine. The words inspired me, and moved each and every individual in that room. It was the confluence of the meaning and the feeling imposed onto the crowd that left me puzzled yet at peace. I can’t recite the poem, but I can tell you exactly how it made me feel and if you also have the power to possess such energetic influence, I encourage you to continue doing what you’re doing. That night, I remembered again why those closest to me inspire me the most. I am sure this poem will be released soon so that you can hopefully agree to this premise.

 I don’t quite know which direction this post was meant to go in but the main theme I am communicating is that we should look up to those who are at arm’s length as we can see the work put in to achieve what they’re doing. I was inspired last night, by love, passion, fearlessness, beauty, heaven, and God. Let me leave you with two of the quotes that found a home in my heart from this poem.

“I’m mindful that a pay check is a primitive eulogy, what will you be remembered for?”

“It’s hard for me to speak my mind when my guts are more eloquent…”

Until next time my lovelies

HLP x

Post Post Grad Reflections

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This post is for the students who have just submitted their last assignments and can finally taste freedom. I want to congratulate you for the sacrifice you have taken in order to achieve such a noble thing. This post is for those who struggle to understand the significance of studying and wonder what the fascination is about. It is for the ignorant ones who feel satisfaction when they ask with such pride “so what is the plan now?” knowing full well that this society is backwards and finding a job is like trying to find a grain of sand in a bin bag full of waste; hard, annoying and almost impossible. I digress, sometimes it’s not your fault, you probably say it out of pure care, but I need you to understand that after education, the last thing we need is to be reminded about it, at least for some time (please). You have to remember that I have made a rational decision to spend time with you in order to free my mind from the stresses of whatever academic activity I have taken part in for the past few years of my life. I need for things to not make sense; I don’t want to use my brain cells which have worked tremendously hard to achieve a couple of numbers. University has done more to me than determine what I plan on doing with my career, so let me summarise why it might be more considerate of you to perhaps ask me for example: “what lessons have been the most valuable during your experience?”

University for me went beyond a number followed by a colon followed by another number. It was the fact that I met a middle aged African man from Nigeria who was a feminist. It was the lessons he taught me, the smile on his face when he could see that his ideologies were understood, valued and accepted. It was the fact that I could simply smile alone when the thought of faces that would change my perspective on life came to mind. It was the memories created with those I hold close to my heart, the junk food I didn’t need to feel guilty about, the stomach cramps I would get from laughing with friends, the nights out, the tears, the joy, the love of my life and so much more. This is not to say that I didn’t work hard, I never had to remind myself why I was at university because education whether institutional or not, has been something I’ve enjoyed, not because I allowed myself to conform and accept some of the ideologies taught to me, but because I could question more. I wouldn’t change my experiences for the world to be put quite simply.

In a conversation with a close friend of mine I had to remind us both of the significance of acquiring our degrees. Going to university was a noble decision. When you see everyone posting a photo with a wordy caption and you think “chill mate, anyone can do this”, you need to understand that whilst that is true, consider what the individual is going through? What and who have they sacrificed? For me personally I owe an apology to my family and friends. I didn’t fully attend to their needs because I was busy rummaging through scholarly articles. I sacrificed another human beings emotional needs and missed out on quality time. To those similar, pat yourself on the back because you did it, and I know it was difficult for you to watch the world snapping cool events knowing you couldn’t be there.

You sacrificed yourself. Like I said in a previous post I am many beings and in this case my student self was prioritised so much that I forgot about my health emotionally and physically. I was lost, my weight shifted from zero to a hundred like a YoYo, I carried bags which held no value and I’d get a spot on my face at least once in a day at some points.

If you’ve ever considered going to university and feel it is right for you, take the time out to understand how important the degree is for your career choice as well as personal growth. It will be hard, but it will also be worth it. I can definitely conclude that the best days of my life so far have been at university.

Until next time,

HLP X

The Upside to the Numerous Existential Crises I’ve Had

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I had my first Existential crisis when I was about ten. Lying next to my mother the sudden realisation of uncomfortable questions left me troubled so I gave myself the courage to ask her the question I had been fearing to because maybe the response would be one of uncertainty. Perhaps it would’ve been one I wouldn’t want to hear, “we’re all going to die and there’s nothing we can do about it”. Despite this, I opened my mouth and burst out my thoughts in the simplest way I could:

“What will happen when the world ends?”

She gave me the perfect answer which was that issues beyond my control should never be ones I should even attempt to fathom. This enabled a peaceful sleep for the first time after so many weeks because for once, I didn’t have to attend to a question I knew I would never be able to produce an answer for. This wasn’t my first Existential crisis and although I had sleepless nights questioning life and my existence, I have become grateful for such moments.

I’m not going to write a long essay on what Existentialism is because there are numerous writers who live and breathe the movement. Like almost every theory, philosophy, movement etc, there are numerous definitions and never one that is fixed. For this post, I will be using the five themes presented by Flynn (2006, p.8). Firstly, existence precedes essence, meaning “what you are (your essence) is a result of your choices (your existence). Essence becomes what you become of yourself, rather than a matter of destiny. Secondly, time is of the essence, meaning that we are time bound beings; lived experiences are qualitative thus “not yet”, “already” and other similar notions differ in meaning and value. Thirdly, Humanism is central to Existentialism. The movement is a person centered Philosophy focusing on the individuals Ideas about identity and meaning amidst the pressures that exist in mass society. The fourth theme explores the centrality of freedom/responsibility, and the fifth is that ethical considerations are paramount- although ethics are mirrored with ‘freedom’ for the Existentialist; there is also an underlying concern to invite us to examine the authenticity of our personal lives and of our society.

Now the reason I have brought my thoughts here is because as much as I hated my experiences of this crisis, I’ve become fearless and I want you to do so as well. Whether you question life and your existence on a regular basis, or haven’t yet, reading this can either prepare you or allow you to overcome the anxiety you encounter. I’ve been able to experience the good, from a few bad experiences. I stumbled on the theory of Existential Positive Psychology (EPP) defined by Wong (2010) as a representation of a natural amalgam between Positive Psychology and Existential Psychology. Questions such as “who am I?”, “how can I be happy?”, “how do I make the right choices?”, or “where do I belong?” become of interest. Following my Existential crisis, I noticed that my perception of life became negative. Instead of giving myself the option to live a more worthwhile lifestyle, I found myself thinking “well what’s the point if I’m going to die anyway?” or even when  I was enjoying life my subconscious self still questioned whether this was all life had to offer. These moments destroyed me because I had no answer to any of these questions. EPP explains this process in detail and highlights that discontentment arises, distracting the individual from life’s satisfactions but also proving opportunity for personal growth. So readers, what I’m saying here is when you encounter your crisis, do not panic and look to healthy discontent. EPP recognises that discontentment is prominent to human nature but distinguishes the two. I will discuss healthy discontentment, which is presented by Existential philosophers and Psychologists who argue that authentic happiness rises from embracing suffering.  The duality hypothesis states that positives and negatives are variables with a relationship and cannot exist separately. This makes a lot of sense to me, although personally I wouldn’t base the essence of my human condition on this hypothesis solely because I would like to think I don’t spend my life living negative experiences with an expectation of something positive arising from this. Your crisis should consider this hypothesis if/when you question matters of life and they happen to take you into a dark place. The negative variable is directly connected to a positive one and you must reap any positive actions to overcome the process. Tell yourself that your life should be lived to its fullest amount because you don’t know what will happen after you’re gone, prioritise the art of authenticity; being yourself and not being intimidated by the reality of your existence. Living in the moment, questioning how existence at that point in time is affecting your essence and bettering yourself. Part of your crisis is because our society is designed in a way that teaches us how we ought to be rather than focusing on how we are in that moment.  Time has been constructed into a thing against us and because of that we encounter so much stress when we feel we are running out of it/ not doing what we are expected to be doing at certain points in our lives, leading us to ask what the point even is if we will soon turn into dust.

To conclude, if you ever find yourself questioning meaning, don’t panic yourself into depression, turn that moment around because positives can arise from negatives and lastly, live your lives authentically and enjoy. Time is your friend, not your enemy.

p.s I’ll leave you with a passage found in The Alchemist (A Fable about living your dream), about focusing on the present moments in life.

“Because I don’t live in either my past or my future. I’m interested only in the present. If you can concentrate always on the present, you’ll be a happy man. You’ll see that there is life in the desert, that there are stars in the heavens, and that tribesmen fight because they are part of the human race. Life will be a party for you, a grand festival, because life is the moment we’re living now”.- Paulo Coelho

Love always,

HLP x

References

Wong, P. (2010). What is Existential Positive Psychology?. International Journal of Existential Psychology & Psychotherapy, 3(1).

Flynn, T. (2006). Existentialism. Oxford: Oxford University Press.

Notes to Self: To Find Yourself

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To find yourself.

I think I have the answer, for now.
It is a journey; but again one must have a destination.

If you set out not knowing where you’re going, you’ll be putting yourself at risk.

Give yourself a place to go, by that I mean what is it that you want to find yourself in?

Music, films, politics, philosophical standpoints, style, religion: The list goes on.

Maybe what made this even more difficult for me was the lack of ability to acknowledge just exactly what I wanted to discover more about myself.

But before I discover where it is I want to go, I will live in the now. For the current me

HLP x